It’s actually mind-boggling that Drake hasn’t toured Australia until now – it’s been a long wait, but the verdict is in: Drake’s headline show is pure flames. Hitting Allphones Arena in Sydney last night, he delivered a 90 minute set that held the perfect balance between slow-motion emo jams, heavy club bangers and mandatory shit talk – all with the confidence of a seasoned performer. I had a really great time, and I even got a seat on the train home! I got so wrapped up in the excitement that I bought a $50 piece of merchandise that I’ll probably never wear, but YOLO.
Here are some of the unforgettable moments that will be etched into my brain forever. For those Australians who haven’t secured their entry to see the Canadian crooner, we’d recommend getting into these shows by any means necessary. Whether you sell your car or befriend a rich person, find yourself tickets:
DRAKE RODE A TRAPEZE OVER THE CROWD WHILE COMPLIMENTING RANDOM FANS
This was the most ignorant shit ever, and I loved every second of it. Drake hopped onto a trapeze which elevated him metres above the audience, where he pointed out fans including the girl in the “Stussy shirt” and the “black and white pants”, which was basically everybody in attendance. Yes, monochrome middle-rung streetwear was definitely the dress code for the night.
As Drake glided like a slightly less graceful guardian angel over the commoners in the cheaper ticket section, I must say I was a little worried – this shit looked less stable than your average celebrity marriage, and the cords hoisting the beloved trapeze looked like the same ones they use at those budget flying foxes you go on during South-East Asian vacations. Please enjoy this additional commentary from Andrew Levins – the only question is, how long until Drake’s trapeze gets its own Instagram account? #DRAKESTRAPEZE
SOME GUY NEXT TO US CRIED DURING ‘MARVIN’S ROOM’
I am so jealous that this dude was able to shed tears during Drake’s most intensely emotional cut. How is it that I can’t cry to this track at Drake’s first Australian live show, but the waterworks arrive every time someone is eliminated on My Kitchen Rules? Also, some bro with dreadlocks asked us for a sip of water so he could drop a pinger. Squad going up mid-week with no chill whatsoever. His comedown is going to be brutal if he’s listening to Drake regularly, spare a thought for this brave soldier.
P.S. Drake also cried at the end of the show.
DRAKE WORE A WALLABIES JERSEY
Does this mean that rugby union jerseys are fashionable now? I can’t wait until it’s socially acceptable for me to wear Matt Dunning’s NSW Waratahs jersey to the club and everybody is frothing. Also, how great is Drake’s facial expression here? It’s made even better by the hot pink bra hanging off his microphone stand. #FOOTY #CHIX #LIFEGOALS
DRAKE LET THE CROWD SING THE WEEKND’S VERSE ON ‘CREW LOVE’
Listening to thousands of Australians trying to harmonise like The Weeknd is pretty great in the worst way possible. It’s exciting that Drake invited the crowd to reinvent his famed 2011 track, this new version might be called ‘Crew Love (Monotone Western Sydney Remix)’.
DRAKE BODIED ALL OF HIS GUEST VERSES
The great thing about Drake is that even when he isn’t releasing albums, he’s releasing mixtapes that are better than most albums, or rapping on other rappers’ songs and making them seem like dogshit in comparison. He always seems to have his fingers in every rap pie possible, and tonight he proved it with guest verses from ASAP Rocky’s ‘Fuckin Problems’, ILoveMakkonen’s ‘Tuesday’ and French Montana’s immortal anthem ‘Pop That’.
But when he brought out OB O’Brien for his remix of the goddess herself Tinashe, it was game over. And then it was game over again when 2 Chainz came out for his guest verse on ‘All Me’, because hearing him yell “My dick so hard it make the metal detector go off” is almost like a Presidential address.